Thanks to Elizabeth Price, Richmond Friends Meeting RE Committee Clerk, for sharing her experience and wisdom! Elizabeth attended the March “Playing in the Light” training at Sandy Spring Meeting (MD). In trainings, we talk about supporting the circle of children and their families, including how to encourage and nurture children’s inclusion in worship.
It all started with a picture that Melinda had shared, and her explanation about having a space for children to be children and present in Meeting for Worship, while also being quiet and respectful. I took photos of three potential spaces in our meeting room. One has a piano and there are frequent sing-alongs there. A bookcase might fit back there. The second space has rocking chairs used during worship. That wouldn’t really work. The third space was near the door leading to the mailroom. There’s a big table there, so that would have to be moved, but I wasn’t sure how it was used, if ever. It would also place the children towards the traditional “front” of the room where the clerk sits. I just kept looking at the pictures and thinking about what might work.
After a few weeks, I concluded there isn’t enough space in the meeting room. I also wasn’t sure our meeting would be comfortable with what might be perceived as a play area for children in the space where we worship. People enjoy hearing the small noises of children, but having a space for children to congregate might not be a welcome concept? I could also see it being perceived as separating them from the adults even though they would still be in the room. We already had some shelving in what we call the mailroom. It contained a small selection of books, a few clipboards, a cardboard box of scrap paper, some crayons, and some markers. There was also a basket of pipe cleaners.
We put the process and location in place so that the children all knew the items on the shelves were available for their use. They would select items to bring with them into the worship room and use them during the 15 minutes they sat in silence before heading out to their classes. I decided to ask the Religious Education committee about improving the selection of items on the bookcase.
Originally, I wanted to put an ornament tree on the bookcase and add papers describing the desired items for the children to have during worship. My thought was that it would get the adults involved with the children’s experience of worship. Instead, the committee agreed that we should use RE budget funds. A few ideas and guiding principles emerged from the committee’s discussion. One parent shared that she encourages her children only to use items that still require something to come from within themselves during the silence. Fiction novels/chapter books/comic books are discouraged. There are books for the younger ages. Activity books received a mixed response from the committee. One committee member agreed to change the books out every month to give kids fresh books to choose from.
A child who was listening to the meeting suggested Crayola Model Magic. They were very excited about having that available. It’s one of the most used items, too! A Montessori style “busy board” contains buckles, zips, etc, for little hands to manipulate and keep busy. The magnetic drawing board is also quite popular. In addition to these items, new crayons, dry erase markers & boards, new colored pencils, and new markers were added.
I used TeachersPayTeachers and searched for calming activities like breathing exercises, mindfulness exercises, and calming prompts. I printed the breathing exercise cards and laminated them. (I took out of the set things like “roar like a lion” that might not go over so well in the silence of worship …) The sign displays allowed us to have the Calming Corner sign visible at the children’s eye level and not on the wall. A simple adhesive hook and ring let the calming exercise cards hang on the display sign. I have a label maker at home and used that to label everything clearly and neatly.
I really wanted the shelves to look new and special. The baskets we used were a special purchase but the little white & green/gray trays are only $2 per set at Target. The colorful mesh baskets on the bottom shelf were more expensive and I decided to purchase these myself – it would be my Christmas gift to the children in the meeting. A Friend liked the baskets for markers so much that I bought a set for our story response materials table, too; she explained that they made it easy for the children to see the colors! Once I had all the items, I stayed after meeting one week to set it all up. I think it took about 30 minutes…no more than an hour. (My kids were waiting on me and will tell you it probably took forever!)
A few times, I’ve asked children what they think of the shelves and the items on them. Without hesitation, they have offered me new ideas. One child in 1st grade asked that we add papers with “I’m not a …” on them. They are the papers with half a drawing, and you are meant to draw something other than what you automatically know it to be. So a paper might say “I am not a balloon,” and the child uses the half of the balloon pictured to make it into something else. This same child also asked for a toy-like item. I explained that we aren’t creating a playtime, so we don’t want to add toys. Instead, anything that helps kids participate in the silence is great. They continued to give me a few more ideas. After thanking them, I encouraged them to let me know if they thought of any more.
There have been a few poor choices, too. The squeeze balls are so loved, they don’t always get returned to the shelves. They do work great, though. They are quiet and keep little hands busy. The only downside to the squeeze balls is a child inevitably will throw it in the air or roll it on the floor. (No adults have complained to me, yet.) I’ve only seen one child leave the room multiple times to keep changing what they wanted, and after about the third time, their parent stopped them.
As far as I know, it’s been well received. Several adults were excited to see the changes and said it was a wonderful thing for the children to have available. I spend about two minutes each week just checking to make sure everything makes it back into the correct tray or basket.
I am humbled by the children who use them and enjoy the options. I’m super amazed at the children who trust me enough to share their ideas with me. All in all, I had fun and it’s been a worthwhile project.